About this time the dreaded self-review process appears.
My work’s review process is a different one, see it here (I think that’s the old version). You get to rate yourself from -1 to 2 on each behavior. I call it “dreaded” not because it is particularly bad, but due to the difficulty in engaging and presenting something appropriately reflective when I am a part-timer who’s tasks are often quite menial and lacking in the do-well/do-badly scale.
You can either order groceries or forget to order groceries, you cannot order groceries better one week than the next. (I think I’m A-okay at ordering groceries, do I rate 0 (neutral), 1 (positive), 2 (excellent)?)
Anyway, alongside this rating system is space for comments and a section to ponder your goals/dreams and aspirations outloud.
I love the world of paper. Everything becomes so much more coherent when you have to write it down.
I used to think I was a goal orientated person but now I think that I proceed with foresight only when I can be bothered… I let a few get through the net and a few I save, neither with much consistency or intentionality. This could just be due to a change in pace of life. The now is too busy for the ‘later’. I’m not sure if this sits well on a number of levels.
At the moment this is me: a few good, often self indulgent ideas that crop up at unsuitable times and get lost in the scribble of life.
The daydreams about learning; French, guitar, cooking, useful sewing (This is not meant to sound housewife’sh, but distinctly practical and with ethical intent!) and take on board some of those ambitious creative things that I’ve always meant to do…
The fact that someday I’d really like to be my own boss, run my own design company and work enough hours (hours that I enjoy) from home to afford to take a bit of time out to continue studying things that don’t make money (like theology), write a book, design a house to every inch of satisfaction, be a part of a church plant, be involved in consistently mentoring one+ of my youth girls past youth group, one day raise kids in a mum-dad as equally shared as possible situation as to maintain a non-stay-at-home-mum-only role (working from home doesn’t count here)…
Is this possible?
My mission statement from way back when:
“I will live with integrity and an understanding of where I stand in relation to God. I will make a difference to the individuals around me by actively listening and putting their needs before my own. I will develop and use any means of communication that have been given to me to positively influence and impact others. I will never be content with a bystander attitude or a passive existence. I will allow myself to fail in order that I might grow. I will seek to develop my character and discover my potential but not allow it to control me. I will glorify God in all areas of life: spiritually, physically, emotionally and mentally.”
It still stands, and maintains the same proability, I just hope I’m not buying in too much to the “passive existence”.
So where then do I start?