I didn’t like the CD at first. Far too pop. Now it’s sneakily grown on me and now and I can’t get away from it. Brooke Fraser – Albertine. Let me lump some lyrics at you.

If I find in myself desires nothing in this world can satisfy
I can only conclude that I was not made for here
If the flesh that I fight is at best only light and momentary
Then of course I’ll feel nude when to where I’m destined I’m compared

Speak to me in the light of the dawn
Mercy comes with the morning
I will sigh and with all creation groan
As I wait for hope to come for me

Am I lost or just less found,
On the straight or on the roundabout of the wrong way?
Is this a soul that stirs in me,
Is it breaking free, wanting to come alive?

`Cause my comfort would prefer for me to be numb
And avoid the impending birth
Of who I was born to become

For we, we are not long here
Our time is but a breath
So we better breathe it
And I, I was made to live
I was made to love
I was made to know you

Hope is coming for me

I was having a conversation with a friend recently about her mum’s thoughts on being a Christian in middle class suburbia and how both natural and difficult it is. (Some of these are my extended thoughts).

The Church and Christian events such as conferences are exceptional at preaching the ‘go get out there’. There is nothing acclaimed what-so-ever about living to your fullest from your house in the suburbs in your everyday job. We uphold these ‘Christian’ Heroes as those who have gone long and far and done big things.

I am not saying that there aren’t individuals that should wind up as overseas missionaries – because I grew up in a household where that was precisely the case and it’s something that has deeply influenced who I am now. There is a need for cross cultural mission. And it’s not as glamorous as it sounds.

Likewise, we shout the praise of working in a church, as a pastor, youth pastor, as someone who runs some enormous ministry. And we jump on the assumption that many church ‘attendees’ are just that. Attendees on Sunday. And many of them are.

I would like the encouragement put there for the majority of Christian suburbia. To actually be effective right where they are.

Yes I help lead a youth group. A very strangely small youth group for the size of our church, but it’s not the role that I love. Geoff tells me that I fluctuate a lot in how much I like leading youth. There is usually several times a year I swear not to be involved any more and hate rocking up on Friday nights. But I love, I love the kids I’ve gotten to know. I love seeing their growth and maturity. It’s so much more important.

Oh just be interested in people. Just love Jesus and what he’s on about.

What more is there to being a Christian? The collective claim positives on fame, but individuals don’t give a rats at position really.

And position is so far from the point, church is sometimes a scary place.

Take risks at home.