sacrifice (un-abridged)

Saying that… I’d be tter write here what I wrote today. Ah the irony, I just happened to have a writing splurge and do two full pagers.

morning 22/4/05

I’m doing the breakfast thing again. I was wrecked last night, just after work – however that’s a pitiful excuse because I got on the computer and was on until late.
I finished my music ‘week off’. I’m glad I had the determination to go through with it. I nearly stuffed it up but at the last minute refused to take my diskman in my bag to work. The time I thought I’d struggle alot was the trip home. As it turns out Geoff and Age took me to Ringwood station, can’t help wondering God if you were in that.
It was hard. Something I’d not like to do frequently. As jas put it, “I’d go insane” – nearly did. You I guess have to learn to fill your time so that you don’t notice – as much.

My aims fr doing the week off music were: to get some headspace. I think that happened to an extent, my awareness that I think my life through songs – let them do the thinking for me was a big factor in doing this – also the fact that I can use my own brain for praising God.
Thinking/singing songs is a fantastic way to connect with God but certainly not the only way. I got time to do that. And the volume -if you can call it that, of stuff I thought through on the train yesterday was staggering. Seemingly little things but nevertheless important before they become or became big things.
It was hard but worthwhile.

God as I bring or rather come back to ‘normality’ with music and the busyness I self-create – help me to slow down, to use my head and thing things through for myself.

Thankyou for your huge part in that small challenge of self discipline and thankyou for the many little ways that time was used and the things you showed me, did for me in helping make it a little easier.

You are a good God, full of love and full of justice, honesty, power and truth.
Jesus how much more self discipline and patience must it have taken to go through dying for us.
Thank you for the enormity of that sacrifice in comparision to my own which is so small it is laughable. You are a God of self discipline and patience. Let me live with a mirrored patience and never forget to thank you.

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