I was talking about my involvement with Gush ie: ‘history in a nutshell’ and some of the not so greats in being a mod today with hmm, no we wont name them. Anyway this person stands almost totally outside my online life, thank goodness (it’s nice to have a few) and hasn’t known me all that long and they said something about me being really patient. To which I sort of scoffed at in the politest way you can do when you are given a compliment. They were being quite genuine and I guess it got me thinking.

I am almost positive I’ve mentioned me and patience before, because as a general rule Rebecca and the big P word have done war fairly consistently over the past years. I am not, in my own eyes or head a very patient person although I am fairly sure I have improved slightly over the past couple of years.

I can look back with curiousity at a ‘blessing’ I was once given. It was a little unusual, it must have been just before or just after we came back from the Solomons for the last time. So I was about 15 perhaps. Johann is a close family friend and we’d been staying at his parents place somewhere up near Sydney. They returned the night or so before we left and on our departure Johann’s Dad asked my Dad if he could, I guess, say a blessing individually for each of us girls. I remember vaguely what Hannah’s was about, not Laura’s or Emilys but I do remember mine.

Patience. It was an extremely odd time to bring that up in my life. I can recall my sisters actually having a bit of a laugh about it as I’m simply not (or wasn’t) patient at all. I didn’t really get the relevance to then, but in a way I’ve seen it play out more and more.

It’s good to know that we are being prepared in some way for what’s ahead, it’s just a pity that we always seem to have to look backwards and find some broader context to know where God’s been working rather then seeing what’s now and relevant. At the same time I like that, we can’t fortune tell our lives and we can’t expect someone else to do that, be it God or human.

Perhaps patience plays a larger part in my life than I realise. Sure hope it doesn’t always have to be that way but thankfully the shaping of us does happen despite the growing pains.

General

What a fine day. After pleasantly beating my alarm up, I stuffed around until it was time to head off to Darryn’s 21st. That’s right, in the middle of the day. A stupendous idea, I intend to do the same, far nicer then an evening with loud music and dancing. Spit roast and other such nice food.

An exceptional afternoon – we (meaning I taxied Sam) were there 5hrs. About a third of the yiters showed up along with a few others I knew/know of. Jacqui – Alecia’s housemate who I’d met once and have no idea how she knows Darryn, Dan of the Berwick yits variety and um Geoff’s sister Anita- not that I’ve talked to her or have even met her but, small world.

Anyway I had excellent conversations with quite a few people. It was good to catch up with Nathan and Jessmyn and Dawn and all those. Can’t believe some of the distance those kids travelled! Dave showed his face later as well as Alecia. Everything was fine and dandy.

Darryn’s little brother is extremely cool. 4yr olds are lucky people, they can run around and go mad and do exactly as they please without anyone thinking they are fools.

Despite it being a family and friends event it wasn’t one of those stuffy, long winded speech type’s which was as it should be.

The sore throat I woke up with is now worse, that’ll teach me for yacking my face off.

General

After posting my ‘camp extravaganza’ I realised I’d missed something.

Sunday morning the guys and girls split up. We got inside and the couches. Roz and Evie lead the ‘stuff’. We started off talking about friendships and Roz read excerpts from a book called, “Big Girls Don’t Whine” which is one I’ve had half an eye on for some time. Now I have to (that’s compulsory) go and get myself a copy. Then we talked about mums and sisters – which was strange for both Laura and myself seeing as we are eachothers, and share one. I confess we ‘dragged’ happily along for far longer than the guys needed to and spent several hours going over all this stuff.

As someone pointed out, we never talk about mums/mothers. We mention fathers all the time but it seems mothers slip off the radar and are probably more of a reckoning force than most of us would like to admit. There was a huge benefit to having Laura there in that we worked out that we have some similar attitudes towards our mum. Closeness – as in the tight friendship thing is something that I don’t have any desire for with her, which as Sam said, is, “a bit sad” but that’s the way it is. And in seeing where she is with God (oh I know she does love God immensely) but she’s not that clear cut and so I haven’t the role model so to speak in that area. I can put myself and I need to put myself in a place where I am working on improving the relationship and see what happens, I guess as long as I am stepping in the right direction…

The topic of mentors has come up lately. Laura, oddly enough has our Grandma as her mentor. I haven’t really got anyone. I had Renee (sort of) for a little while, but it didn’t quite work as it should with distance as an issue. I genuinely want a mentor, I can see the huge value in it, but something in me still wonders how it would work. I honestly don’t know what I’d talk to ‘her’ about. My words have a far grander time of making it from my head to paper then they do from head to mouth. Apparently you can go and chat to Kathy (Pete’s wife) and she’ll find you someone – an older godly woman from the church asap. I need a bit more of a push and shove before I do this… how would it work with someone you don’t know? I’m tempted to talk to Evie about it, she’s what, 26 – still not sure though – might be better to just keep her as a friend.

I guess I shall have to continue and uh, maybe even start praying about it.

General